Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Wedding | Maid of Honor Speech.

{me in action at my sister's wedding last August}

My sister was honored to serve as the matron-of-honor at her good friend's wedding this past weekend, and in helping her tweak her speech, I was inspired to write down a few tips I learned not only in being hers last August (pictured above), but over the many lovely weddings I've attended since I hit a certain age.

(1) BREVITY.  This is numero uno because it is so. important.  No one, especially after a few drinks, has the attention span for a long-winded speech from someone who does not respond to "Mr. President."

(2) Explain yourself.  Do not focus too much on your relationship with the bride, as the speech should be about wishing the couple well, BUT also make it understood why you are the one chosen to be there next to her.

(3) Sweet and sentimental.  You must give the happy couple "congratulations," "best wishes," and/or "a lifetime of happiness."  Do not forget to actually address them specifically and acknowledge why you are standing before their 183 guests.

(4) Funny.  If you tell an anecdote or funny story, it should be (a) obvious why this is the one you picked to share (relevance!) and (b) keep it short (back to #1!), or people will tune out before the punchline and/or get confused.

(5) Speaking of funny.  Without opening a can of worms, for whatever reason, many people still believe women are not as funny as men.  To that I say anything Tina Fey & Amy Poehler.  But this means a lot of guests will assume the best man will be the funny one and steal the spotlight.  It is not a competition (obviously), but being sure of what you are saying, sweet, maybe emotional, and sneaking in a laugh or two, you'll charm the guests up good.  More importantly, give the bride and groom the well wishes they deserve and will treasure.

(6) No such thing as perfection.  You'll always think of something you wish you had said months after (I'm still doing this with my sister), but it is never all going to come to you at the moment you put your speech together.  So push perfection out of your mind.  Get your real, sporadic thoughts down on paper (maybe have a glass of wine first to loosen up the mind!), then go back to it in a few days and see what clicks.  And if you are able to memorize it before the big day, all the better, as you'll seem far more natural.

Have any other tips on building a maid of honor speech?  Agree or disagree with any of my suggestions?  Tell us in the comments!

xo. di.

*image by Andrew Williamson Photography


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  3. Great post! I agree with all of it! I will have to write a speech for my big sister Amanda's wedding next May and I will keep all of these hints in mind :). Sigh...now I have nervous butterflies about public speaking!

  4. ah, I'm glad it will be useful to you soon(ish)! I also am pretty terrified of public speaking, and while the butterflies will likely still be there on your sister's wedding day, once you start talking you'll be so happy you get to wish them well publicly!

  5. GREAT call, I should have included that! I definitely watched closely what I drank before, and always had a water bottle in my hand until it was all over. A drunken, sloppy speech is not the way you want to be remembered!

  6. I enjoy public speaking but still get nervous, something I do if there is a podium, I use a paper clip n I bend until it's straight! It helps keep your hands from fidgeting and it releases some nerves!


thanks so much for the note! i love reading your comments. xo. di.

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